I Never

You know I will be 74 years old on April 16. What this means to me most of all is that there are so many things that "I never" did and that I now know I will never do. When I was young, I mean from about 13 on to 15 I spent a lot of time in the movies. The big ones then were musicals and starred Betty Grable, Betty Hutton, Alice Faye, Ann Southern, great women singers. Movies shaped the lives of all young ladies of my time. I have all my life loved music and loved to sing. I would go to the movie and stay til I knew the words to every song and most of the words to the script. What I wanted to do was have some black hose, some black high heels and sit on top of a piano and sing "Cuddle Up A Little Closer Lovey Mine". I will "never" get to do that. I can no longer wear high high heels and would not be able to get on top of the piano and if I did I wouldn't be able to get down. Again from the movies, I wanted to use a cigarette case and a long cigarette holder. l will "never" do that. Do you have any idea what cigarettes cost? Plus do you know how they smell? I will "never" be able to be a nurse in the operating room. I was intrigued with a series of books about Cherry Ames who was every kind of nurse you could be. I think I read every one of them. I can't stand the feel of rubber gloves. I will "never" get to burn my bra in protest of something, anything. I don't think they do that any more. Plus there is something that makes me think an old lady burning her bra is just sad. I was rather active in the nuclear freeze movement back in the cold war days but I "never" got to go to the Pantex plant outside of Amarillo and chain myself to their fence so that they could not move parts to the bombs that were manufactured there. Before I could do that everyone agreed with the movement. I did have a bumper sticker that said "You can't hug a child with nuclear arms". Somehow that wasn't the same.

So I will just be content with what I did get to do. I got to speak at Boston University and at Georgetown. I got to go to England and Scotland many times. I got to visit Europe and I went to the airport in Wichita Falls when John F. Kennedy was running for President and made one of those whistle stops here. I didn't get to shake his hand but I stood this close to his sister Pat Lawford. I sang with Merle Haggard. Now I guess to be honest I was sitting in the auditorium at Midwestern University when he appeared and I sang along with Merle and the audience. But hey when you are about 74 you get to tell it the way you want to,

Plus of course I have done all those things that women of my generation are supposed to talk about. I fell in love with the man I married. I had healthy children and grandchildren and now great grandchildren. I got to know and love my sister and her family and I have dear and wonderful friends. I am healthy, I never go to the doctor (if truth be told, I am convinced that is why I am healthy), I do not take a single pill, I go to a job I enjoy every day. I sit a hands length away from a woman I have known for over 50 years and worked with for most of that time and who I consider my best friend.

So I approach 74 years of age with few regrets. I wish I had talked about Jesus more, prayed more and studied more. I am trying to remedy that so I do not consider it a "never". All in all its a good life. Thank you Lord for Blessing me.